Why Cleo Makes Me Laugh

There are always scenes in a book that I either laugh or cry over the most.

I always knew one of the witches would have a cat. I just didn't know it would be someone like Cleo.

I probably look more than a little strange as I type away and laugh or sniffle. With A Demon Does it Better it has to be Cleo who had me laughing. A cat who overindulges in catnip wine can only turn out hilarious. She may have started out life as the queen of the Nile and known for her lovers, Cleo is now a plump Persian cat with mega attitude and believing Lili can’t have a decent love life if she doesn’t listen to Cleo.

I hope you enjoy this scene with Cleo. If you have any questions for her, feel free to ask.

Cleo lay in the middle of the floor sprawled on her back, staring intently at her frothy plume of a tail that waved back and forth. She hummed a snake charmer’s tune as the tail danced in circles before her twitching nose.
The feline twisted her head around and stared at the witch and demon with glazed eyes.
“What do you do with a drunken kitty? What do you do with a drunken kitty? What do you do with a drunken kitty early in the morning!” Cleo howled loud enough to shatter glass.
“If I didn’t know better I’d think she was drunk,” Jared choked back a laugh. He hastily erased his grin when the witch turned to spear him with a look fit to hex.
“She is,” Lili said grimly. “That furry twit wasn’t happy she couldn’t go to Asmeth’s, so she managed to get hold of catnip wine. How did you get all those bottles?” she demanded of the cat. “I never keep more than one bottle in the house. Do you know what each bottle costs?” Her shriek rang through the house rattling the paintings on the wall and a vase on the mantel started to teeter back and forth before settling back in its original spot.
Cleo laughed boisterously as she waved a paw in a wide circle. “Did you know they deliver and all you have to do is give them your credit card number and for an extra fee they’ll even magick express it?” She purred. “So that’s what I did. I gave them your Visa.” She started waving both paws in the air. “They’re even willing to set up an auto delivery, so I said yes.” The cat cackled with glee.
Jared looked down at the clattering sound on the floor. He watched in amazement as the many bottles rolled into the kitchen and tossed themselves into the recycling container.
“You’re the one that will have to suffer the hangover in the morning,” Lili snarled, standing over the intoxicated cat. “And it won’t be pretty. Remember 1936? You were sick for days.” She threw up her hands. “I should make you sleep outside.”
Jared turned away to hide the grin that was stretching his mouth to the limit.
“And here I thought I’d seen it all,” he muttered, struggling not to laugh and quickly losing the battle.
“Don’t even think about it,” she warned him. “You’ll only encourage her.”
“I’m only a puss in a gilded cage,” Cleo warbled, rolling from one side to the other.
Jared shook his head and walked into the kitchen. He dropped onto one of the chairs and buried his face in his hands, his shoulders shaking with the laughter he could no longer hold back. The sound sounded foreign and rusty to his ears. When was the last time he’d truly laughed in true amusement?
“It’s not funny!” Lili stormed in, her magick flying around her in erratic flutters. “Cleo can be out of control when she’s sober, but you have no idea how bad she is when she’s drunk on catnip wine. One time she even snuck into a zoo and tried to seduce a lion!”
He shook his head, unable to form any coherent words. His mouth worked. “My stomach hurts,” he finally gasped.

The following is from the next morning

Cleo wearing extra dark sunglasses was spread out on the hood.
“You better not have left any claw marks on my baby.” Lili reached inside her SUV and pulled out her coffee tumbler. The liquid was still hot and bracing on her tongue.
“Talk to the paw.” She held up an appendage, offering the witch a wicked smile as long razor-sharp claws shot out. She lowered it to the metal and etched her name with that painful nails- on- a- chalkboard screech. Lili snarled and covered her ears with her hands. The witch shot an array of ent sparks toward Cleo that had her jumping up in the air as the scratches disappeared.
“I hate you,” the cat sneered when she landed all feet down. “There was no reason to drag me out here just because you needed to get in touch with your inner witch. I could have stayed home deliberately shedding all over your bed.”
“Not when you’d probably projectile vomit all over my silk comforter. Besides, I wasn’t the one who overindulged on catnip wine last night and maxed out my Visa.” She waited until Cleo crawled her way into the passenger seat.
“Just kill me now or give me a hangover remedy,” the feline moaned, curling up on the seat with her nose tucked into her tail.
“The potion doesn’t y don’t work on catnip wine and you know it. You’ll just have to suck it up and suffer the consequences of your wild night.” She glanced at the clock on the dashboard. She gauged she had just enough time to make it home and get dressed for work.
“I smell the demon on you.” Cleo wrinkled her nose. Her lush fur ruffled. “How come he gets around so much and can’t leave the hospital for good? If I had to smell that musty wizard doc all the time I’d be outta there like a puss on a mouse.”

Demons Do It Better!

The list can be so long and give a woman a lot of ideas!

I’m sure many of you have read books where the demons are downright ugly and totally gross.

Then there are the demons who are sex on the hoof.

Jared in A Demon Does It Better is one of those.

What does a demon do better? He can take an innocuous moment and make it so sexy that you would melt. Such as he did with his first meeting with Lili when she’s in a scent shop in the magickal plane of Inderman.

Can you imagine holding a bottle of perfume and have a man show you just how sensual it is? This is how Jared did it and proof a demon does it better.

He picked up the bottle and carefully tipped it against his fingertip. Turning toward her he gently traced a path down her throat then repeated the touch on each wrist. The oil turned to liquid heat, causing a lot of thoughts of wearing the perfume and nothing else.
Lili couldn’t keep her eyes off his hands. Strong, capable, yet gentle. She was positive they would feel the same everywhere else on her.
Get your mind back where it belongs!
Easier said than done.
He lifted her hand, palm up, and leaned over to sniff her wrist. His breath drifted over the surface. When he lifted his head, his eyes blazed a vivid blue.
“She’s right,” he murmured. “This is meant for you.”

Demons are sensual creatures. Ones who relish the feel of flesh against flesh. Here’s evidence that Jared likes to take it one step further.

Before Lili could ask him what he was doing, he pulled her out of her chair and into his arms. He captured her mouth, kissing her so deeply the action was as intimate as sex. It blistered her down to her toes and she could only hang on for the ride as his tongue invaded her mouth without her even thinking of protesting. Lili gripped his arms, feeling the hard muscles ripple under her touch. She kept her eyes closed, losing herself in the sensual clouds that moved around her. She felt wrapped in something that seeped into her bones. A heat that was untamed and had her wondering if the images that flared behind her closed eyelids were his or hers. Sheets flowed around them while their naked bodies writhed in ecstasy, a magick that was wild setting the room afire as they sought something on a far sensual plane that few could attain. A pairing that was so perfect that her senses cried at the beauty that flooded her mind. Now she knew he shared the same images.

But demons have a sense of humor too. It’s necessary when a sexy demon is encountering a drunken kitty.

Jared turned away to hide the grin that was stretching his mouth to the limit.
“And here I thought I’d seen it all,” he muttered, struggling not to laugh and quickly losing the battle.
“Don’t even think about it,” she warned him. “You’ll only encourage her.”
“I’m only a puss in a gilded cage,” Cleo warbled, rolling from one side to the other.
Jared shook his head and walked into the kitchen. He dropped onto one of the chairs and buried his face in his hands, his shoulders shaking with the laughter he could no longer hold back. The sound sounded foreign and rusty to his ears. When was the last time he’d truly laughed in true amusement?
“It’s not funny!” Lili stormed in, her magick flying around her in erratic flutters. “Cleo can be out of control when she’s sober, but you have no idea how bad she is when she’s drunk on catnip wine. One time she even snuck into a zoo and tried to seduce a lion!”

He shook his head, unable to form any coherent words. His mouth worked. “My stomach hurts,” he finally gasped.

It’s not thought that demons have a sense of right and wrong. Or worrying about others. Jared might have literally been branded a psychopath, but he reveals there’s much more to him than a dangerous streak.

Jared smiled and shrugged. “I don’t know. I had this strong feeling that you needed me and the shadows took over from there. It was like that first time I showed up at your house.” He touched her face with his fingertips, pulling them away, and staring at the dampness on his skin. “Don’t cry for us, love. We’ve all been demented for so long we don’t know anything else. Heal the ones above and leave us to our punishment.”

And last but not least, this demon is a team player. No matter what he does, he does it better.

Jared smiled and stole her breath with his kiss. “I guess a witch and demon as a team do it even better.”

Any ideas what you feel a demon does better?

Linda

A Magickal Fusion

Welcome to the world of magick and mayhem

Hm, if I’m not careful I’ll be humming a magickal version of ‘It’s A Small World’! And now you’ll hate me for that tune bouncing around inside your head.

But if you think about it the title works well for the world I’ve created.

I’m an only child so perhaps that’s why world building turns so real for me.

It’s always been difficult for me to describe my world since it resides inside my head. Sort of a special computer that allows me to switch from one world to another. I’m a big fan of The Big Bang Theory and Sheldon has a make-believe world that sometimes I wonder is close to what I do. A very scary thought!

My writing turns into a 3D movie inside my head. I can see the Victorian house Jazz and Krebs share, the color, sights and sounds of the boardwalk where Nick’s office building resides. The funky mountain town Stasi and Blair live in. The desert-like compound Maggie knows as home. Lili’s cozy cottage, the mixture of gothic and modern that’s known as Crying Souls Hospital and Asylum, and the magickal plane of Inderman with everything that tempts the magickal senses.

I wish I could draw because I’d love nothing better than to create my world for others to see. But I can’t draw a straight line with a ruler. My 8th grade art instructor gave me a D even though I flunked the course, because he said he had never failed a student and couldn’t that time. Trust me, you don’t even want to see my stick figures.

So I try to show my world with words and descriptions. I hope you see the characters the way I do, their worlds, and even what goes on around them. That you feel a part of the story and you might even look over your shoulder if a shadow doesn’t appear what it should be or just maybe that cat has a knowing look in her eye.

Is that sparkle in the air a hint of pixie dust or just a trick of sunlight? What about that dog howling? Is it really a dog you hear or something more sinister?

And what about that woman standing behind you at Starbucks? Is there something ‘different’ about her?

That’s how my world works. Anything is possible.

Is that what you want from your world? To do the improbable?

Linda

A World of Magick

Anyone who’s known me for a long time is aware I’m actually very shy. Ask me about myself and I sort of stare at the floor. I’m not trying to be difficult, but I can’t imagine anyone wants to know about me.

Ask me about my critters and I’ll talk your ear off. Ask me about my books and your other ear will follow ear number one. And you’ll be running for the hills.

I think it also has to do with something that happened in 1983 when I was still a newly published author with my third book just out. I was at a very large group signing and met an author who I’d enjoyed for some years. I was so excited to have a chance to meet her and tried to do my best not to gush. The minute the woman learned I wrote category romance I was suddenly relegated to the lowest of the low. She was so rude to me that I couldn’t believe anyone would act like that. I didn’t read her books after that. That could be why I feel better when my books speak for me.

Perhaps it’s because I’m an only child that my characters have always been real to me. I see them in 3-D inside my head and there are times when I’m positive Fluff and Puff the magick bunny slippers are roaming the house, Irma’s taken over the passenger seat in my SUV, or Maggie’s on duty if I’m running errands after dark. Who knows, maybe Lili’s around when I’m sick and Cleo’s crooning the Soft Kitty song.

Whether writing or reading, the characters are important to me. They are what rounds out the story.

I can sit here and talk about Lili, how she came about in my head (you have to admit it’s kind of funny to have a witch doctor heroine), what kind of man will enter her life, and what creature will be her sidekick.

Lili made her first appearance in 50 Ways to Hex Your Lover as wallmail correspondence between her and Jazz. I wasn’t entirely sure when her book would appear in the series. I have a file with notes, ideas of her story, and creature thoughts.

I also knew it meant deciding what historical facts I’d weave into the book. One I won’t mention since it has to do with the plot and one of the characters.

Creating an asylum as dark and disgusting as I did was actually easy. A movie I’ve watched more than once is Bedlam, starring Boris Karloff. A ‘hospital’ housing the mentally ill in ways no one would want to comprehend. A Demon Does It Better was the perfect background for an asylum and easy to create a demon hero who was literally branded a homicidal maniac. Especially, when you consider the hospital was ultra-modern and the dungeon was still back in the 1700s. Although there is the hospital greeter, a vulture perched over the hospital doorway announcing everyone will die. Yes, he’s a bit of sunshine.

Cleo was easy since I wanted a diva kitty and giving her Cleopatra’s heritage made it fun.

A Demon Does It Better is special for two very good reasons. It’s dedicated to my mom who passed away last fall and to a wonderful friend, Beverly Barton, who I also miss every day.

This is what I can talk about. Characters, families and friends who all seem to be intertwined.

What does it mean to you? Would you prefer knowing everything about the author (although please don’t ask my weight or how I lost my virginity! No joke. Someone did ask me that once!) or about the books themselves?

A Magickal Journey

My path as a writer has been a strange and winding one. Plus never boring.

After all, 32 years ago I started out with sweet traditional romances and worked my way up to sexier romances and now witches, and vampires, and demons, oh my!

Funny thing is some people think I’ve only been writing for a few years since they don’t know me before my Hex and Demon series. Now I’m putting out many of my backlist books showing my readers there’s many sides to me. And isn’t that scary!

And fun.

I like to think my readers can identify with my characters. I know I do. Friends say I’m most like Jazz, my first witch. I know she’s said and done things I’d love to do. And a few that I have done. I have bunny slippers that tend to end up in odd parts of the house. I swear I can hear them screaming if one of my dogs drags them around the house.

So what does that say about me? I love my paranormal world? It’s real to me. No, I don’t hear voices. Well, yes, I do and if I don’t listen to them the book doesn’t go the way it should. :} So it’s a good thing.

While an excellent story is necessary, I’ve always felt it’s the characters that make it ‘real’.

Are the characters in a book important to you? Do they make you hungry for the next book?

Those Pesky Resolutions

Long ago I spent the first of every year writing out my New Year resolutions. The list was pretty much the usual along with whatever had to do with me personally, get back to my workouts on a regular basis, be nicer in the grocery store (don’t ask), polish the furniture before I can write my name in the dust, do more cooking than just throw something in the crock pot,

Then there’s the writing resolutions. Make all my deadlines, don’t play paper toss game when I should be writing (I should take the app from my Nook, but it’s so fun!), write a certain number of pages per day.

There is an excellent reason why I don’t make resolutions. They’re too easy to break.

What I’ve done instead is make out a wish list. I don’t do this just at the first of the year, but add to it throughout the year. There is no reason why it should just have to do with January. I have a variety of wish lists. What I’d like to do with my writing. Personal wishes and anything else that comes to mind. The fun part is crossing out something once it’s accomplished.

How I do this is thinking what’s lurking in my imagination. What book I hope to write and finish. List the books I hope to see go to contract. Are there conferences I hope to attend.

Putting them down in print makes it real. A promise that I need to do what I’ve said.

Some would say it’s the same with resolutions, but calling it a wish list makes it easier for me.

And don’t we all like to see wishes come true?

Do you make resolutions? And if you do, how many do you find you keep or do you close your eyes and toss the list?

How would you feel if you made a wish list? Would it be easier to keep or accomplish?

Linda

Cleo Tells All

“Desdomoana Haversham here,” the ghostly television hostess smiled at the camera. Dressed in a flowing white gown, her snowy hair rippling in waves down her back, and skin like rare porcelain, the spirit looked the part of one long gone. “My guest today is Cleo, the former queen of the Nile.” She wrinkled her aristocratic nose and stifled a delicate sneeze. “I deeply apologize, I am allergic to cats.”

“You’re dead.” Cleo sniffed back. The chinchilla Persian cat sat on a bright pink silk cushion with the same regal bearing. “Plus, I do not shed.” She ignored a couple silvery hairs floating in the air.

Desdomoana dabbed at her nose with a snowy-white linen handkerchief. “Yes, well, we are here to talk about you and your witch, are we not?”

“Yes, we are,” the fluffy feline purred. “And I must say I am very pleased to be back in San Francisco and especially, Inderman where we can find a higher quality of salmon.”

“What can you tell my viewers about Lili Carter? Yes, we know she is a powerful witch with healing magick in her bones, but what is she like at home?” Desdomoana leaned forward, her pale blue glittering with glee at the prospect of learning the dark and dirty. “Does she have odd habits? Uses her magick all the time? What is going on with the lovely witch now? Tell all, my dear.”

Cleo tapped her paw against her mouth in though then sighed. “The witch is boring with a capital B.”

“Boring? Never!”

The feline leaned forward. “Do you know how long it’s been since she’s gone on a date? Even had coffee with a male, appropriate or non? As for sex, well …” her voice drifted off. “What can I say? For someone of Greek descent, she is more a Vestal Virgin. Although they weren’t as virginal as they claimed. The ones in Pompeii were especially ….” She tittered. “But I hope to see that change.”

“How so?” Desdomoana’s purr rivaled Cleo’s. “Don’t tease us, darling.”

Cleo looked over her shoulder before turning back to the PNN, Pretenatural News Network, hostess. “Well, as you know, Lili is on the staff at Crying Souls Hospital and Asylum,” she said in a low voice as if afraid of being overheard other than the thousands of creatures watching the broadcast. “Now you tell, me how many suitable males can you find at a hospital?”

“Mundanes always seem to enjoy if they affiliate with a doctor,” Desdomoana chimed in.

“Trust me, not at Crying Souls.” Cleo raised her eyes to the ceiling. “Not a suitable one in the bunch. I have devoted my life to seeing that witch mated the an appropriate male, but that isn’t happening.” If she’d been humanoid she would have looked as if she was biting her lip. “It’s a trifle dry in here, don’t you think? Would you have any catnip wine around?”

“No, we don’t. You found someone for her,” the sultry vampire cooed. “Didn’t you?”

“I have more chosen a proper male for her than once and she has always turned them down.” The cat sighed. “Lili is not one to choose well and I’m afraid that could happen this time. Although,” she absently chewed on a claw, “we did meet this lovely specimen in the scent shop in Inderman. Her pulse did race when he spoke to her and I must say I’d raise my tail for him any time.” She looked around. “Are you sure you don’t have any catnip wine in the studio?”

“Yes, I am,” Desdomoana snapped. “We are here to discuss Lili Carter. She’s well known for her work with not just the supernatural community but even treating mundanes. And you are also known for your involvement helping the younglings when they’re in the hospital. Why would you both return to San Francisco after so many decades? Did she leave because of a scandal?” Her dark eyes fired with avarice for juicy gossip. “We understand that Dr. Carter worked in Bedlam hospital during its worst. Is that why she will be working in the asylum at Crying Souls? It’s been said there are truly evil creatures housed there. Isn’t she afraid of dealing with the afflicted?”

Cleo uttered a hiss of frustration. “She’s a doctor, for Fates sake! She treats who is ill.” She ripped off the tiny microphone slipped in her fur. “This interview is over. I should have known you were too cheap to have catnip wine on hand.” She stalked off the set.

“We aren’t finished!” Desdomoana yelped, raising blood-red tipped fingers.

“The Queen of the Nile has left the building,” came back to the vampire.

What about you? What question would you ask Lili’s furry partner? Cleo tends to talk more if you have catnip wine on hand.

Linda