Saturday, March 27, 2010

Those Late Night Callers

It happens every so often where the phone rings in the middle of the night. You’re jolted awake, adrenaline pumping, and you instantly think, “what’s wrong?”

That was me last night when the phone rang at 3am. Just the one ring so obviously a wrong number and nothing showed up on Caller ID. But could I go back to sleep? No! Plus Barney got restless and everyone else in the house was still sound asleep. How dare they!

After sucking down a pot of coffee this morning, I remembered one night when the phone rang and rang and rang.

I was in college and my dad was out of the country on business. The phone started ringing around 2am and naturally my mom is afraid it might be something to do with him. Some of this is what she relayed to me after each call.

Mom – “Hello?”

Man’s voice very slurred – “Art’s Landing? I wanna make a reservation.” (Fishing boat rental)

Mom – “You’ve got the wrong number.”

Twenty minutes later, same thing. Fifteen minutes later same thing. Mom would have preferred ignoring the phone, but then you never know and no Caller ID back then.

By the fourth call she was yelling at this guy and you just know it wasn’t sinking in that he wasn’t calling Art’s Landing.

I told her to let me take the next call. Sure enough, it rang a few minutes later.

Me – “Art’s Landing. How can I help you?”

Man, oh yeah, slurred all right -- “Thank God! I’ve been trying to get you all evening. Lady said I had the wrong number.”

Me – “Oh, I’m sorry. What can I do for you?”

Man – “I wanna make a reservation.”

Me – “Of course. For how many?”

Man – “Just me.” And he gave me his name.

Me – “Terrific. Be at the dock at 4:30 sharp.”
Man thanked me and hung up.

And we had peace for the rest of the night!
I wonder if he showed up insisting he had a reservation or if he just slept it off.

Did you ever have anything like that?



  1. That's hilarious. Very quick thinking on your part.

    We get a lot of solicitors calling at work. Usually a phone company or a marketing deal. We asked to be removed from the calling list, but since we're a business they say there is no such thing.

    Last time AT&T called and asked to speak to someone in charge of the phone service, I told them that we no longer had phones. They were so confused, but said okay, sorry to bother you. Another time we told them we were switching to walkie talkies.

    Sometimes, when the marketing people call and ask for my boss, I tell them she got fired and that she caused a scene and it was all very awkward and to try back sometime next year.

    Man, I crack myself up.

  2. LOL Elle! Yeah, I've pulled some things too.

    One of our radio stations took on a telemarketer, except in a way you really can't do. The DJ told the guy he was a homicide detective, man the TM was calling was dead and wanted to know what the TM knew. The recording was hysterical.

    I usually want to say "the judge is taking a nap and you don't disturb the judge for anything."

    I think the absolute craziest was a telemarketer calling to tell my dad he won a cruise. She insisted Dad had signed up for the contest. I kept telling her no he hadn't. I finally got mad and said "he's been dead for 7 years!" She got real quiet, said "oh" and hung up.

  3. LOL! Love these stories!!! I'm never quick enough to think of great comebacks.

  4. Tori,

    I've been told I think fast on my feet, but there's times I'd like to have a script nearby. :}

  5. Been there on the late night calls and you describe it perfectly. Great personal stories.

  6. Thanks Lizzie.

    And with those you don't need coffee.