Pet Peeves -- I Haz Dem

I’m sure we all have pet peeves. Little ones, medium size ones and the ultra big ones that make us scream.

Yesterday I saw a few of mine that had me ready to scream at more than a few people.

So I thought I’d take the safer route and talk about them.

Not just list some of my pet peeves but also how I deal with some of them.

Peeve -- A big one has to do with people who talk during a movie. Have your conversation before and after, not during! One, it’s downright rude. Two, it’s more than annoying. And nowadays if you tell someone to please be quiet they tend to get in your face.

How I handle it – A friend and I came up with the ‘movie cough’. It came by accident years ago when we both had bronchitis but had to see a particular movie. Theater had few people in it but it seemed they all wanted to sit by us. Until we coughed. So now I sound like I’m losing a lung and they sit elsewhere. We have a few other methods, but the cough works nicely. We don’t use it in a crowded theater, but we tended to go when we knew there wouldn’t be a crowd.

Peeve – People pushing to get on the elevator while all I want to do is get off.

How I Handle It – I get cranky. I want off and if someone’s toes get stepped on, oh well, they should have stood back and let me pass. Times like that I wish I had my dad’s cane. I’m sure it making ‘accidental’ contact with someone’s toes would make more of an impression than my foot could.

Peeve -- People still leaving their children or pets in a car while they go into a store.

I saw that yesterday with a woman leaving her elderly lab in the back of her car, windows rolled up and the car parked in the sun. Just because it was a chilly day didn't mean the dog would be all right. Or when a mother thinks there's no harm leaving her kids in the car with the motor running so the heater or A/C could run. Keanu Reeves said it best in the movie, Parenthood. 'You know, Mrs. Buckman, you need a license to buy a dog, to drive a car - hell, you even need a license to catch a fish. But they'll let any #%&*%$#(* be a father.' I'd say that counts for mothers too.

Peeve – People not watching the road because they’re talking on their cell phone.

Yes, it’s illegal and yes, we see it all the time. And how many of you have been almost run over in a parking lot or run off the road because that driver isn’t paying attention? One woman talking on her cell phone almost backed into me while I was loading the back of my SUV with groceries. I yelled at her to stop then yelled “one word, Bluetooth!” She stared at me, rolled down her window and said “for one thing, that doesn’t work with phones and for another, Bluetooth is two words.” She drove off. It took me a minute to stop my head from spinning.

Peeve – Someone in the grocery store with a full cart in the express lane.

A clerk once told me they can’t refuse to help the person once they’ve started loading items on the belt. All they can do is remind the person that it is the express lane. I say let the ones behind that person at them.

Peeve – Mama’s little darling pushing a stroller or ‘future customer’ shopping cart around the grocery store at warp speed or kids skating on their wheeled shoes. Especially if that cart or stroller is behind you and Damien loves to smack you with the cart or stroller and Mom coos “oh sweetheart, mustn’t do that” instead of taking the cart away from the diabolical little devil.

Nothing you can do about that unless you want to scream in pain. What can I say? It’s been tempting to try that.

Peeve – Sitting in the doctor’s office where it states to turn off your cell phone but there’s always someone carrying on a conversation you really don’t care to hear.

Unfortunately, those people don’t care. I’ve been tempted to take notes and thank them for new material for my next book. It’s just a shame almost all the time it’s nothing I could really use.

Peeve – People cutting in front of you in line, stating they’re next when you are.

When I was younger I just fumed and let them do it. My being short seems to allow people to think they can get away with it. Funny thing, after I turned forty I was more “excuse me, I’m next.”
A friend said I was finally tapping into my inner goddess. I’m sure some would say I was tapping into something else. :}

Peeve – People using a handicapped slot when they don’t qualify.

It’s absolutely not fair to those who need to park close to a store. Sad to say, I don’t think enough of them get caught.

Peeve -- People thinking it's okay to talk baby talk to your pet.

How one was handled -- Bogie, my beloved Chihuahua/Yorkie, hated anyone using their cutsey oppsie voice. He'd actually back up and look at me with his 'MOOOM!' expression.

Then there was one of the times at our bird groomer. I would take Syd, our Panama Nape Amazon parrot and Max, our greenwing macaw to the groomer for a bath and trim. Karen, the groomer, and I would go out to lunch once she was finished. She worked out of her house. One time a client was really laying on the 'aren't you so cute!' voice to Karen's buffoon macaw, Buffy. Buffy stared her down and said (no joke) 'get real lady!' then turned her back on the client.

Little peeves.

My husband not wiping out the sink after he’s trimmed his beard. We won’t even talk about the toothpaste tube top rarely put back on.

The dogs thinking it’s okay to leave their toys on the stairs. And they have more than enough to leave one on each step.

Dishes not rinsed off and left in the sink to congeal.

Finding used glasses everywhere but the sink.

But I can live with them even if I do a lot of muttering.

What about you?

What pet peeves do you have? What has you grinding your teeth and wishing mayhem on someone?

Linda